rayofmemory's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ::Anger Management:: Song of the Moment: "The Fight Song" ~ Marilyn Manson. One thing I hate about having an online diary is that some of my friends have the url and it makes it complictaed to bitch about certain things. So I always try my hardest to be vague, but that causes problems because everyone assumes the entry is about them. So yeah. I don't remember that point to this, so here the fuck I go. I'm fuming. And I don't really understand why. You ever get that, where you're pissed because someone is rubbing you the wrong way, but you don't really know why or you can't pin-point it. Yeah. No fun. Like something they said irritated you but then everything they said after that got to you, you know? GUR! I can't stand it when people preach things to me and then turn against it. It irritates me to no end. I'm not the worlds most perfect person and I can be hipocritical sometimes and I don't ever claim that I'm not but it pisses me off when a person does exactly what they told me not to do. I'm also known to take things a little too personally. Mostly the shit that wasn't directed to me in any way. Just things that I'm not used to people saying around me. You know what, I'm not even going to get into that. Nevermind. I'm so drained now. Yes, I was a bitch and I understand that I'm always a bitch, it's just how I am. I assume that people aren't going to take what I say out of context and then they do and then I feel guilty. I hate drama. So much that I'm willing to detach myself. Everytime we all get together something goes down. Then most of the time some people don't even know what the fuck is going on. Totally and completely oblivious. I find that interesting. I'm so tired. I'm so upset. I'm so emotionally drained. Am I being unreasonable? Or are the other people being that way? Is this all in my head? Did I put myself in this situation? Does anyone even give a fuck anymore? Is anyone ever really paying attention to anyone else's feelings anymore? No, I don't think so. ps. I'm starting to realize just how bad of a person I really am. 1:49 a.m. - 2003-07-20 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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