rayofmemory's Diaryland Diary

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::there's always more behind it than you think::

It's just too noisey here. I decided I needed to lie down for a while. I fell asleep with my headphones on, listening to some depressing song around five, only to be awaken by my father yelling my name while yanking the headphones of my head. "Why the hell are you sleeping now? Don't you get enough sleep at night? Get up, dinners ready." Fuck you asshole. And no, if you paid any attention to my existence you would know that I have sleeping issues. Only time you give a shit is when you want me to do something for you. Sometimes little things happen that make me want to scream at the top of my lungs and see if anyone flinches. See if anyone is listening. Or cry a river and drown in my own tears. I could have it worse, I know. But sometimes I want to be saved...but I feel I should suffer to the point that it is hard to breathe.

10:57 p.m. - 2003-01-13

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